irregular burbling

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Area DJ in clueless shocker

April 29, 2004

As usual this morning, I was woken up by my radio alarm blasting out top-notch local radio station Huddersfield's Home 107.9, whose breakfast show is compered by DJ Nick Hancock (no relation to the Stoke-supporting sports quiz host).

This morning Nick was complaining about computer viruses and how they'd infected his computer "yet again". He then issued a mock plea for help saying "If anyone wants to come by and fix my computer, feel free". Later on, someone rang in to ask what anti-virus software Nick had, to which Nick replied "Errrr, don't ask me anything too technical". Fair enough, I suppose.

However, the corker came when he told his listeners that he knows that attachments could contain viruses but that he opens them anyway. Apparently "they have such compelling titles, like 'Read this, it'll change your life'" that he opens any old attached file from anyone, including people he's never heard of "in case it does change my life"!

Arrrgh! I'll come round and fix your computer all right, with a fucking half-brick! You massive cunt! It's twats like you who are responsible for the ever increasing deluge of virus-infected emails plaguing the online world! You utter, utter pillock! Every time you fall for some shitty, lame social engineering trick it "changes the lives" of everyone in your shiteing address book, you drooling bampot! Get a fucking CLUE!

Hem. This has been a public service announcement.


Posted by Jonah at April 29, 2004 9:24 AM


Well said old boy.

I am so glad I'm out of the tech support game. You have to deal with pratts like this on a daily basis whilst smiling nicely. All the while thinking about how much fun it would be to provide Stanley the pitball with their decapitated head as a fucktoy.

Of course, on the other hand, I no longer have sway over the monkeys that fix my printer. I miss the power.

Posted by: robbie at April 29, 2004 1:12 PM

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